It's the Economy, Jew Boy!

PART FOUR.

Lieberman walked out from behind the desk towards me. White cuticles of hair lingered around the rim of his black loafers. With a boyish bounce he seated himself on the front side of the desk and crossed his legs. A harsh glare, much more intense than the rigged interrogation lamps, reflected back at me. My hands instinctively covered my eyes. As my eyes accepted the new glare I was able to face Lieberman’s smug grin. The bastard wasn’t wearing any socks.

He continued his drone: “You see, Bill, I do not believe for one second that the American people are stupid. The fact is that they don’t like to think. It’s taken me many years and a failed presidential campaign to understand that fact. I don’t believe it to be a failure of character so much as a fundamental flaw in all human beings. We, the people, have just exacerbated it, turned excess’s harsh light on a basic plague afflicting us all. It’s not pretty, Bill, not pretty. So, I am going to ask you once, nicely: start playing ball. You want to stay on this campaign, maybe even get paid for your writing?”

I nodded reflexively.

“Well, good. Welcome aboard. You get to cover the Senator like every other nutless douchebag with a press pass and a better salary. Stick to the facts, ask opaque questions, nod, laugh at bad jokes, and turn in your 500 words. Maybe you could come up with a catchy slogan, something the campaign can use. In the mean time, get out of my sight. I don’t want to see you again and you certainly do not want to see me again.”

And with that he left. A door opened on the right side of his desk and he walked through it. Another door opened on the left side of the desk and one of the bodyguards gestured towards it. I was free to go.